I have been personally struggling with regrets and feelings of loss lately. I screwed up and it has been mentally numbing thinking about what could have been instead of what is. Then I have a conversation with my ex-wife about our son's confidence level. He struggles with his confidence levels and it too numbs or stifles his achievements and performances. I speak to him about the concepts of a growth mindset over a fixed mindset. I speak to him about how the mind listens to the body and how push-ups and other activities prime the mind for achievement and performance.
Anyway to the point. I saw him and said to him
Stop caring and start believing.
By stop caring, I don't mean to stop caring about treating your sister with respect or stop caring about your homework - instead start believing that it's important to treat your sister with respect and act on that belief - start believing that educating your mind is essential and start acting in ways to promote that belief.
I went on to say that often caring causes worry. Caring what others think causes you to worry. Instead believe you are doing the best you can. Believe you are ready for the pass the game. Believe you know you'll be ok. Believe in yourself.
And also believe me when I say you can do it. Believe your coach when he tells you that you made varsity because you earned it. Believe the UW-Whitewater coach when he singles you out for your efforts, skills and talents... believe what they say because they believe in you....I continued by explaining that the UW-Whitewater coach singled you out because he believes in you. You made varsity as a freshman because Coach Blasco believes in you. I believe in you. Now believe in yourself.
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